Tuesday, April 09, 2002

We have returned to glamorous New Jersey from exciting Minneapolis. I haven't mentioned it before, for fear of jinxing things, but I was very leery of getting on a plane at this particular juncture in the "war on terrorism." Airport security is largely a put-on, I fear. At this point, I doubt that a terrorist is going to attempt to pass through a metal detector while posing as a passenger who just "forgot" about that gun, knife or box cutter he was carrying. (Although you never know--I heard someone got through airport screeners carrying eight [8!] knives the other day.) Nevertheless, we all have to go through the motions. I was "wanded" and required to remove my shoes at one checkpoint. I saw an elderly lady being wanded, too. My 11-year-old son was also wanded. I guess they must have thought we hid explosive devices in his cargo pants.

Speaking of cargo, it seems to me that these days a smart terrorist would attempt to sneak something on a plane that way--in the checked luggage or the cargo that passenger planes often carry. According to security analysts on CNN, the vast majority of it isn't screened at all. The airlines don't have the equipment, or the time, to examine it. (And forget about baggage matching--it's meaningless in the era of suicide terrorists.) They also don't secure their baggage-loading areas very well, or conduct extensive background checks on the drones they hire to load the planes. Supposedly, this Achilles heal will be eliminated over the next year or so.

Meanwhile, "they" will continue to "wand" white-haired old ladies and assure us all that airport security is much tighter today. It's important that you believe that and continue to board planes to "wherever your destination may be." Far be it from me to tell you otherwise. After all, our economy depends on it.

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