Live Long and Prosper

Here's a Guide To Living Forever.

If you can call it living.

While waiting in line at the bank today, I heard a man who said he was 70 years old (he looked older) complaining about his mother. He said she was 96 and couldn't endorse her government checks, because "she doesn't know what's going on anymore." He laughed and then said, "When I get old I think I'll shoot myself."