What I really want for Christmas

According to Google

What I really want for Christmas is...

"Brian Wilson's ninth official solo album"
"Peace in the Universe and all Parallel dimensions"
"a Big Mouth Billy Bass or a Travis the Singing Trout"
"an apartment close to my university"
"to NEVER leave your lap"
"to see my daughter have a great one!"
"nothing at all. You may ask why. The reason is I have not been good at all the hole [sic] year"
"peace, and since that ain't happ-nin, I wonder if anyone might track me down a copy of Herotodous" [sic]
"to have my book indexed by Google Print and Yahoo!'s Open Content Alliance"
"(shhhh. . .) a couple truckloads of aged manure. That's my most heartfelt desire"
"a new banjo, an apple iBook, a boyfriend, a personal chiropracter, and for my X-friend to stop being a bitch"
"a telepathic computer"
"my Master, a dungeon and being tortured/beaten"
"respect. Well, and attention. Should I wear the see-through dress again?"
"a good old fashion pick ax" [sic]
"Star Trek technology"
"A Palace Like That One, Daddy!"
"a pet reindeer, especially Rudolph"
"a Tivo that can capture multiple, simultaneous programs from the incoming cable feed (for 'trainwreck nights')"
"a Nietzsche plushie, although I wouldn't turn down a Soctrates [sic] or a Van Gogh (with detachable ear)"