"I only change light bulbs ironically"

How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"What? You don't KNOW?"

"I've got that on vinyl."

"You must be referring to that Sonic Youth cover of the Captain Beefheart song. Lightbulbs are uptown, anyways. Haven't you heard? You haven't heard?"

"Dude, just use candles."

"One to change the bulb and another to scoff and say 'I hate fucking hipsters.'"

"Light Bulbs are SOOO mainstream. Candles have a better quality of light and they give a way better vibe."

"It takes...Oh, excuse me, I have to go trim my beard. I'm starting to look like a real man."

"None. I call this next piece 'Dark.'"

"You probably never heard of them but i use push-in low voltage LED bulbs. They’re so much better than that cliche Edison base. Best of all I only need a few people to help! Most of the time I can get it done with only 3 or 4."

"It depends if thrift stores sell vintage light bulbs in Brooklyn."

"There's an app for that."

More answers here.