Quotations from Aunt Betty

Below are some quotes from Aunt Betty, the member of the extended in-law family who died recently. She was quite an amusing conversationalist and enjoyed sending us witty postcards filled with charming non-sequiturs, nonsense, and other bon mots.

"Would love to see you but have no excuse as my crucial non-cooperative light bulb was replaced Thursday."

"I have large mole hills overlooking greenery in back. What to do and be good environmentalist?? At least they are architects of sorts."

"Richard has selected a lovely refrigerator that does not depend for a living on BLUE ICE."

"Whether it's a poem, a jingle, a verse, a charade, an advent window or a watchacalit, I welcome it or grabbit for my Holiday Loquat tree with loving pause (paws?)"

"Hi from the land of recalls where the Terminator has just held his press conference. I'm going to the dental surgeon to be cheered up." [Aunt Betty lived in Kahleefornyuh.]

"Escargot is disappointed, as he expected to be honored on the new stamp, as indeed he should have been."

"Holly Davis sometimes leaves a note asking me if my 'fixer upper' house is for sale. She has given me a free pad (to suggest I find another pad?)"

"I have wisely learned over the years to be paranoid."