Head Rattle

I.
It occurs to me that the best way to watch the right-wing Republican National Convention is on left-wing MSNBC. Nevertheless, I don't intend to watch it.

II.
While cleaning the basement, I came upon a cardboard box that contained, among other items, a package of "Magic Rocks" that I bought years ago. These are multicolored sodium silicate crystals that grow into funky little stalagmite formations when you put them in water with a "Magic Solution". I can't remember why I bought such a childish thing and then never let them perform their alchemy. It might be that I thought I would put them in my aquarium but then realized that, because they are (according to the packaging) a "severe eye irritant" and "harmful if swallowed", they would hurt the fish. I think I'll find a jar this weekend and see what happens. I could use a little magic right now.

III.
Some things just pop out at you when you're reading a new novel, such as passages like this: "I need to eat, I feel so weak and my head feels like the crusty anus of a sloth." I wonder... how, exactly, did this author conduct her research on sloths?